Feasting Friday- Welcome to my Bacon Plate Redux

This is an update of an older post...but worth bringing back!

thanks barryschuler.com

I was reading an article recently that claimed that Bacon has jumped the shark.  I think the author of said article has clearly taken leave of his senses, because the bottom line is that while I have no need for bacon scented soap ...

Or bacon flavored chewing gum...

But the creative ways that chefs are using my favorite meat candy continues to delight and inspire me.

We all know about my love affair with the Pig.

Braised shoulder, smoked butt, Christmas Ham, BBQ ribs, Crispy Belly, grilled Chops, glorious Tuscan Crown Roast. I put ground pork in my meatloaf and meatballs, layer succulent slices of prosciutto over figs, and I believe that a whisper-thin slice of lardo, meltingly translucent on a grilled piece of rustic bread kissed with roasted garlic is a desert island dish.

But nothing compares to my love of bacon.

Mahogany slices next to scrambled eggs. Lardons on my frisee salad. A shattering circle of pancetta on my bruschetta. Spaghetti carbonara. Wrapped around dates or asparagus.  Crispy bits atop scallops, enveloping my meatloaf, wrapped around a filet of beef or venison, or, frankly, your shoe!

I love the Vosges bacon chocolate bars.

I am trying to score a trip to Portland to visit Voodoo Doughnuts and try their Maple Bacon Long John.

When entering the ill-fated Plugra Butter competition, I was sure the winning recipe would be my Honey Bacon Butter. What else would you want on your waffles? Butter. With honey. And crispy pieces of bacon. I still can’t believe I didn’t win.

So when I was sitting at brunch a while back with my friend Tracey, and we were splitting a side order of really lovely Nueske bacon with our frittatas, and I was telling her about the genius Bacon Explosion I had read about on Michael Ruhlman’s Blog

Suddenly I announced that I wished my plate were made of bacon…lightning bolt.

Think on it, people.

Plate.

Made.

Of.

Bacon.

A thin, crispy sheet of bacony goodness upon which to serve any number of complementary foodstuffs.

Imagine a fresh arugula salad, peppery and slicked with good olive oil, bright with a squeeze of lemon or a splash of sherry vinegar. Some shavings of pecorino or creamy crumbles of chevre. Maybe some dried cherries or caramelized walnuts or roasted blood oranges.

Now imagine this perfect salad, ON A BACON PLATE! Can’t you just taste it? C’mon, you know you want to.

Alright, salad not your thing? You think bacon is better at breakfast? Okey dokey, think stack of hot buttermilk pancakes, dripping with butter and good maple syrup.

ON A BACON PLATE!

My mind reeled at the possibilities. I mean, sure, you can have your basic bacon plate, just simple smoky goodness. But there suddenly came flood of variations. Bacon plate caramelized with cinnamon and brown sugar. Glazed with BBQ sauce. Black Pepper and Honey Bacon Plate, Maple Glazed Bacon Plate, Honey Mustard Bacon Plate, Spicy Cajun Bacon Plate, Teriyaki Bacon Plate, Herbs de Provence Bacon Plate, Chicken Fried Bacon Plate…it is endless!

And then it really came to me. CHOCOLATE COVERED BACON PLATE WITH ALMONDS!!!!! Or rather, chocolate covered bacon BOWL with almonds, in which to serve ice cream.

I could pass out.

It was too good an idea, too tempting a project.

I was born to Bacon Plate.

I was not born to have success right out of the box.

The night of our brunch I took a package of Nueske's bacon out of my freezer to thaw, so that I could begin the new BP era. When I awoke in the morning, there was a lightness in my heart, a spring in my step. There was not the tiniest worry that I would fail.

And here is what your Bacon Obsessed Polymath discovered.

BACON PLATE NOTES: V1

Tried two versions, one with basket weave bacon slices, one with slices just slightly overlapped. Baked at 400 degrees on parchment sheet on pan for approx. 18 minutes.

1. I must buy thin sliced bacon, the extra-thick-cut stuff I keep in my freezer doesn’t get brittle and crispy the way it needs to. Also need to cook with a second sheet pan on top so they don’t curl.

2. Better to overlap the slices slightly than basket weave. Same reasons as above.

3. It is surprisingly easy to eat an entire package of bacon.

4. Not having a sprightly arugula salad or stack of pancakes to put upon my bacon plates, I found that the second best use is to put it dead in the middle of your peanut butter and strawberry jam sandwich for breakfast. (See #3) And to make my sad but fave version of BLTs, which is just BLs, (‘cause I don’t like raw tomatoes), but I do like equal parts of crispy bacon and iceberg lettuce between two slices of plotchy white bread. (See #3)

5. This is a totally viable project, I will wait a couple of months for my blood to return to an appropriate red-cell-to-bacon-fat ratio and then do a second attempt.

6. Despite having eaten an entire package of bacon between breakfast and lunch, it is still possible to need lemon linguine for dinner.

7. There is something equally lovely and pathetic about spending a Saturday in your pajamas on a bacon binge.

8. Having done #4, I am convinced that a chocolate covered bacon bowl is officially the best possible receptacle for a scoop of strawberry ice cream, and must figure out way to make this happen.

As with many things that I get instantly passionate about and then abandon just as quickly, the Great Bacon Plate Experiment was destined to be a random weekend fling and not a consuming permanent romance. I simply abandoned the project, such as it was. I figured that I could, if called upon, probably make a decent bacon plate by just fixing some of the stuff that went wrong during testing, and really, more testing was not necessary. Especially since I am trying to be good about my food these days, and I clearly cannot be trusted alone in the house with bacon.

I frankly forgot all about it, and turned my attention to less butt-expanding pursuits like reorganizing my closets and moving stuff around in my apartment.

Until the other day when a friend asked me whatever happened with the Bacon Plate Experiment.

I had also conveniently forgotten that for several days after the Experiment I had told many people about my new amazing invention, always problematic if you are going to give up on something quickly…makes you look flaky. Especially if you tell them that you think you can market your idea to restaurants and supermarkets and to not be surprised if Billy Mays is hocking a monthly Bacon Plate Club on late night cable someday.

(This obviously before he was, um, all dead and all…which is a major blow since I can’t really see the ShamWow! guy doing justice to a Bacon Plate)

I had to admit to her that I had yet to actually create a successful Bacon Plate, and that I had pretty much given up due to wanting my blood to actually continue to get through my veins unimpeded.

She laughed and admitted to me that she has at least fourteen notebooks containing pages of scribbles about different side businesses that she wanted to start, and that once she got all the notes down, her desire to actually start the businesses went away.

It makes me feel better to know that I am not the only one to get all amped up about something and then let it go just as quickly.

I started thinking about such projects in my own life, and discovered that they were many.

There was the genius idea my sister and I had about creating a sort of rubber soled disposable ballet slipper kind of shoe that could fold up and fit in your purse for when your feet get sore at weddings and other stillettoed events but you don't want to stop dancing. Or walking. This involved my actually…wait for it….making a pair of shoes. And then doing nothing with them. SHOE FAIL

Note:  My sister recently called me to say she had seen a pair of our fantastic hypothetical shoe in a store, meaning that once again we are not genius entrepreneur millionairesses.

Then there was the sudden need to have the inset squares on the ceiling of my dining room painted in a gold-on-gold harlequin pattern which I believed I could achieve by painting the pattern on pieces of foam core and then attaching to the ceiling. I did two out of twenty, got them up, they looked weird, so I gave up. I did not, for the record, take them down until my recent Project Apartment 2.0 mania. (I did, for the record, put them up about 6 ½ years ago.) CEILING FAIL

Note:  The two squares continue to have splotches where taking the squares down pulled off not only the paint but some of the drywall paper as well.  They look great next to the Chinese paper lanterns I put up for a Chinese-themed dinner party.  In 1994. 

I have bought pieces of furniture with the express intent of stripping off layers of paint and giving them new life, only to have them languish in the basement. FURNITURE FAIL

I once bought all the supplies I would need to can my own jam and other delectables into beautiful jars…the jars and other canning equipment are in my basement, pristine and unused. CANNING FAIL

Note:  With my summer successes with quick pickles, I still have every intention of bringing back the canning project.  I'm just still so nervous, what with my food safety issues and all, deep down I'm pretty sure there might be botulism in my future, and not as an injectable.  But I'm working on it.
At least the Bacon Plate Project didn’t require special equipment, and of all the things I ever gave up on, is the only one that at least has the side benefit of keeping me somewhat healthier!

But it did make me think about all of my favorite bacon-y recipes, all of which taste even better now that Fall is descending.

So I thought I would share some of my best bacon recipes, just in time for the weekend.

And if any of you have any success with the bacon plate...I want pictures.  And a percentage.

Bacon Dates

thanks foodnetwork.com

8 oz. chive or scallion cream cheese
2 pkg. California pitted dates
1 lb thin sliced bacon, slices halved, and blanched 1 minute in boiling water (or ready to eat bacon)

Make a slice lengthwise in one side of dates. Stuff with ½ T cream cheese. Wrap in half slice bacon and skewer with toothpicks.  Bake in 400 degree oven 10-12 minutes or until bacon is crisp, or cook under broiler but WATCH CAREFULLY!!!!

Bacon-Wrapped  Barbeque Meatloaf
 
 

thanks foodnetwork.com

2 tsp. vegetable oil
1 medium onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 large eggs
2 tsp. fresh thyme
1 tsp salt
½ tsp black pepper
2 tsp Dijon mustard
2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
½ c Greek yogurt (can sub sour cream or whole milk)
1 lb. ground beef chuck
½ lb. ground pork
½ lb. ground veal
½ c French’s fried onions, chopped
2/3 c crushed saltine crackers or dried bread crumbs
1/3 c minced fresh parsley
8oz of your favorite barbeque sauce (bottled or homemade)
8 oz. bacon, sliced thin
2 T brown sugar
1 T tomato paste
1 T maple syrup

For the glaze: Mix the barbeque sauce with the brown sugar, tomato paste and maple syrup in saucepan, set aside.

For the meat loaf: Heat oven to 350 degrees. Heat oil in medium skillet. Add onion and garlic; sauté until softened, about 5 minutes. Set aside to cool while preparing remaining ingredients.

Mix eggs with thyme, salt, pepper, mustard, Worcestershire sauce, and yogurt. Add egg mixture to meat in large bowl along with crackers, fried onions, parsley, and cooked onion and garlic; mix with fork until evenly blended and meat mixture does not stick to bowl. (If mixture sticks, add additional milk, a couple tablespoons at a time until mix no longer sticks.)

With wet hands, pat mixture into approximately 9-by-5-inch loaf shape on a foil lined and greased sheet pan. Brush with half of the glaze, then arrange bacon slices, crosswise, over loaf, overlapping slightly and tucking  bacon tip ends under loaf. Bake loaf until bacon is crisp and loaf registers 160 degrees, about 1 hour. Cool at least 20 minutes. Simmer remaining glaze over medium heat until thickened slightly. Slice meat loaf and serve with extra glaze passed separately.

Sweet Bacon Jam
 
If you want this and don't want to make it yourself, buy this version.

thanks bakingandpastryschool.com

1 T olive oil
1 lb slab bacon, diced in small squares
2 onions, chopped
2 T balsamic vinegar
½ c maple syrup
1 c port wine or cream sherry
Pepper to taste.

Heat a deep skillet with oil and cook bacon until fat is almost completely rendered out. Keep ¼ c of the bacon fat in pan, reserving the rest for other uses.  Add onions to pan, cooking until well caramelized. Add balsamic and cook 2-3 minutes longer. Add the maple syrup and cook slowly, about 5 minutes. Add port and pepper to taste and cook gently 20-30 minutes until it is the consistency of jam.  This is a great base for appetizers, it is great with cheeses, or use it as a condiment for steaks.

Linguine All'amatriciana

thanks recipemashups.com

1/2 pound of unsliced pancetta ( you can substitute slab bacon)
3 T olive oil
1 onion, chopped
1 1/2 pounds canned tomatoes, preferably San Marzano
1/2 t red-pepper flakes
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 pound dried lingune or perciatelli
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese

Cut the pancetta into chunks less than one-half inch thick. Place in a saucepan with the olive oil and fry over low heat for 15 minutes, until all the fat has been rendered out and the meat is very crisp. Remove the meat from the pan with a slotted spoon and set aside.Add the onion to the pan and saute over medium heat for five minutes.Drain the tomatoes, finely chop them and add to the onion in the pan. Season with red-pepper flakes and salt and pepper to taste and simmer 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Bring a large pot of cold water to a boil and add salt to taste. Add the pasta and cook until al dente, about 9 to 12 minutes, depending on the brand. Drain well.

Transfer the cooked sauce to a large heavy skillet over medium-high heat. Add the pasta and the reserved meat and cook, stirring, for 30 seconds. Remove the skillet from the heat, add the cheese and mix very well. Transfer the pasta to a warm platter and serve immediately.

Despite my preference for keeping bacon to delicious food items, I will admit, I do sorta want these shoes a little bit....

thanks geekology.com

Most importantly, if you are really a bacon fiend, get yourself some Nueske's, especially their new cherrywood smoked stuff...it is the epitome of bacon perfection and you don't even want to know how much I have in my freezer. 

I will only say that for his birthday, Charming Suitor received (not from me) a 5 pound package!

What are your favorite uses for bacon?

Yours in Good (smoky) Taste,
The Polymath

The Parlor and the Kitchen- DIY

As you have by now deduced, I have a strong streak of DIY in me, even if it does battle with my inherent and deep-rooted laziness. I love a project around the house. As long as I can complete it successfully before I get bored, and before it gets too hard. You can read more about this illness in this post.


However, despite my skill at procrastination and my preference for watching police procedurals on television over doing actual work, I usually don’t shy away from things that will ultimately make my life easier, or my apartment more beautiful. I have successfully painted both the horrible circa 1976 linoleum flooring and vintage Formica counter in my bathroom. And yes, I know these are two surfaces not known for taking well to paint, however I am a person who does not take well to ugly, so I worked some polymathematical magic.




I kitted out the guest room closet with a wall of built-in shelves all by my lonesome, can you say glorious shoe closet? Back in the day I could assemble any piece of IKEA or other boxed furniture in record time and without leftover bits and pieces. I am very grateful to not have to decorate with boxed furniture anymore, but I was always pretty proud of my skills in that arena.




But when it comes to food and entertaining, I have always been pretty vocal about not feeling the need to do every single thing myself. I’m a fan of a potluck, letting my foodie pals show off their skills. And I’m not above calling out for pizza if things get tricky or something goes awry in my prep.




A journalist once asked me in an interview if I thought of myself as a Martha Stewart type. I thought about this for a moment. On the one hand, I do subscribe to a lifestyle that includes making even the mundane as beautiful as possible, that honors guests in my home and seeks to make that experience as purely pleasurable as possible for them. I like collections of things, I like decorating, I love cooking. So Martha and I certainly have a lot of things in common.



We also have a lot of things we do not share. I do not have a eleventy-gabillion dollar budget and a full time staff of minions doing my bidding and my gardening and creating the perfect shade of robin’s egg blue paint for that cast-off cabinet I am repurposing for the mudroom. I also do not have a mudroom. And weirdly, with her time in the slammer, she may have more street cred than I do.

I appreciate her drive and ambition and the empire she has created for herself. I’m less impressed with the idea that one has to present their ideas as the “right” way to do something, as opposed to “one interesting” way to do something. While it makes for some hilarious television watching moments to see MS bring on an expert to show her something and then patronize them, and essentially fix what she believes wrong with their way of doing things. I’m sure that Voice Of God tone of authority isn’t purposely horribly condescending, but there is a sense that one gets from her “advice” that if you are stupid enough to do it another way, you will suffer the consequences of your actions. But one Polymath has to acknowledge another, and there is no doubt that for every thing I have ever seen from Martha that made me cringe, there is another idea I have embraced and appreciated.




I eventually replied to the reporter that I do think of myself as a Martha Stewart type, just without the clenched perfectionism. I think you can have a wonderful dinner party without firing the dishes in the kiln out back and weaving your own napkins from wool you spun last night from your personal flock of monogrammed sheep. I actually think you can have a great dinner party on paper plates with takeout food, because at the end of the day, entertaining is ultimately about sharing time with the people you care about and everything else is gilding the lily.


I have been vocal for years about things like not baking my own bread, not because I can’t, I certainly can….I am a Polymath after all…but because there are wonderful local bakeries who do it better and more deliciously, and I choose to put my energy elsewhere. I love to make desserts, but I don’t hesitate to pick one up somewhere if the flavor I want is better done by a professional. I don’t want to make my own puff pastry or phyllo dough. There is perfectly good frozen stuff available, and I’d rather focus on fillings.

So it may come as something of a shock to discover that at the moment, I am making my own sparkling water and pop.


I’ve never been much of a pop drinker. I have always hated most diet versions of things, I especially think Diet Coke tastes strongly of old socks. I hate the tinny flavor of most artificial sweeteners, and the lingering aftertaste. I do find that Diet Barq’s root beer and Fresca avoid this, so those are my go-to choices. I love real classic Coke, preferably icy cold in the small 8 oz glass bottles, but more as a treat than as a beverage. I love a good ginger ale, but again, the real stuff not diet, and I cannot justify the amount of sugar in non-diet drinks, so I limit myself to an occasional treat. On a daily basis, I’m more of a plain water (tap, mineral, sparkling, still) or tea (iced or hot) kind of girl. At least I was. Until I found LaCroix Pamplemousse.

It is important to know a few things about me.




One, I think most sparkling flavored waters taste strongly of furniture polish.




Two, pamplemousse is my favorite single word in French. It means grapefruit, which is one of my favorite flavors, but I think even if I didn’t like the flavor of grapefruit, I would still love the word. Just say it once, out loud. C’mon, no one is listening. Pamplemousse. Pronounced POM-PLA-MOOSE. Isn’t that fun? Don’t you want to say it again? I always thought if I ever had a restaurant I would name it Pamplemousse. Except your Polymath does not want to work that hard.




Three, pamplemousse is also Charming Suitor’s favorite word in French, something we discovered early on in our courtship. He has spent years trying to get his friends to name their pets, and alternately children, Pamplemousse. He will occasionally look me in the eye and say “You had me at Pamplemousse.” which I am sure is making you throw up a little in your mouth right now, but it literally makes my heart melt every time.




So when LaCroix came out with a grapefruit version of their flavored sparkling water and called it Pamplemousse, I had to try it. I don’t know if I love it because it actually is delicious, or because I was psychologically pre-disposed to like it based on the name, but the fact is that I now drink about two to three cases of it a week. CS loves it too, as do some of my closest friends, so I like to think it is really just tasty. Very lightly flavored, and oddly great with most food. No artificial colors or flavors or salt or sweetener, so it is good for my program.




But it is also about $5 a case, and while it isn’t exactly a smoking habit, it isn’t cheap. And even though I recycle, the volume of cans is a little embarrassing.




My dear friend, Brooklyn Harry, recently admitted that his new passion was making his own sparkling water and pop at home with a gadget called a Soda Stream. The last couple of times I visited with him, he made some for me, and it was really good. But then I got home and sort of forgot about it.




Until they generously sent me one to try.

First off, yes, it is one more appliance, and it only does one thing, so it breaks my Ruhlman rule of keeping it simple and trying not to clutter up the kitchen. On the other hand, it does that one thing so well, and it is getting so much use, I prefer to put it in the Rice Cooker category, as not clutter, but essential.




For starters, it is dead easy. Five minutes after I opened the box, I was drinking a frosty glass of homemade soda water. No electricity, no batteries, so it can be anywhere. Pop in the canister, fill the special bottle with cold water, screw it into the machine, pull the lever three times and presto! Fizzy lifting drinks in your own home! They sent nearly a dozen flavors to try out, and the first one I tried was, of course, Diet Pink Grapefruit. It tastes very close to Fresca, but with the bonus of a lovely pink color. And while I do enjoy the flavor of the full strength, I quickly discovered that putting just a drop in the bottle, I can pretty well mimic my beloved Pamplemousse.




They have a great ginger ale, which CS loved, and both regular and diet Tonic, so mixers for cocktail parties are well covered. You name your favorite pop, they have a version. There are 38 flavors all told, in regular and diet, with four ‘essences’ for unsweetened flavored water. Sadly, no grapefruit essence yet, but I’m hopeful! And an unexpected shocker, even the regular flavors are about a third the calories and carbs and sugars of the commercial brands, with half the caffeine and almost no sodium, so when I want to indulge, I’m not totally derailing my program.




I wish I could say that I’m exclusively making my own carbonated beverages, saving money and not being part of the can culture, but I do have to be honest about my LaCroix consumption. Reduced, but not eliminated. Pamplemousse, I just can’t quit you!




Regardless, it is fun to be able to offer guests their own custom fizzies when they arrive, I am glad not to have to keep tonic and soda slowly going flat in the pantry on the off chance someone wants a cocktail, and I am experimenting with making some of my own flavorings by adding in fresh pureed fruit, herbs, and other fun stuff. Cucumber mint is delish, ditto strawberry basil. The bottles of mix are only about $5,and make 12 liters, so it is very affordable, but you can also experiment with those wonderful French and Italian soda syrups, just add slowly to find the amounts that work for you.




I think Martha would approve.




Yours in good taste,
The Polymath

The Parlor and The Kitchen- Chopper

I am a true Gemini in many ways. Which can be frustrating, since I am often of two complete minds about things, both sides may make sense to me, and it can be hard to reconcile the two halves of my odd whole.

Kitchen equipment is a perfect example.

On the one hand, I generally appreciate and subscribe to the Michael Ruhlman school of thought, which is that any good cook only needs a few basic quality tools to practice their craft. I absolutely know that most of my cooking takes place in one stockpot, one large skillet, and one small saucepan. There is frankly not much I cannot do with these three pots.

And yet, between my three C’s (cast iron, copper and Calphalon) I own no fewer than 29 various pots and pans:

And don’t think there aren’t many more which I covet and dream about…Mauviel haunts me, many shapes and sizes of Le Creuset seem to want very much to come live at my house, and I await with baited breath my next visit to Paris where I fully intend to lose my s*** in the aisles of E. Dehillerin, where Julia Child bought her favorite cookware.

(It is important to note, that one of the many many amazing surprises about Charming Suitor, and one of the first things he shared with me that made me know we were destined be together, was his admission that when he goes to Paris he takes an extra empty suitcase so that he can FILL IT UP AT DEHILLERIN!!!!! I mean really, who would not fall in love with a man like that?)

I know in my heart that all I need is a regular spoon, a slotted spoon and a spatula, maybe one pair of tongs. But there are these:

I want to be a smart cook, I want to have an organized and uncluttered kitchen, I really do. At least, half of me does. That half wants to cook simple, with a few high quality, well-loved classic items that will serve me my entire culinary life.

The other half wants my kitchen to look like Sur la Table and Williams Sonoma got together and became the Duggars of the food world.

It is a curse.

Take cutting and chopping. I know that 95% of my slicing and dicing and mincing happen with a good 8” chef’s knife and a 4” paring knife. Did that stop me from acquiring:

Clearly not.

Wanna know where else that Gemini two-headed monster comes in? Skill vs. laziness.

I have excellent knife skills. Significantly above average. I’m not Martin Yan, and I do have to watch what I am doing, but I am very VERY good with a knife. I pride myself on my knife skills. But I do so hate to have to do more than minimal prep. It takes so long. I am not patient. I just want to get to the cooking already. I know a lot of cooks who love prep, they find it soothing, it calms their minds. Not me. I like the action. The sizzle and the simmer and the stirring and the tasting for seasoning.

This is why I have a big food processor. And a little food processor. And a mandoline. And infinite other tools designed to take the muss and fuss out of all that chopping.

Which the creates the new problem for the lazy side of me…schlepping the equipment down and setting it up and then the cleaning up, which takes up all the time one saves on the whole not-chopping thing.

When everyone and their brother started coming out with their own version of a tiny easy tabletop chopper, I succumbed. That smacking the chopper looked so easy and fun on TV, there were oodles of versions at Bed Bath and Beyond, and most of them were pretty affordable. Who is sassier than Brian Boitano using one to salsa music on his oddly entertaining cooking show? And while I find the Slap Chop guy creepy, he does make the equipment look useful. I didn’t have (and still don’t) any desire to try and make salsa right on my cutting board, or mix up tuna salad “in a flash”. I just want to chop up my onions and garlic and shallots and other basics quickly and efficiently. So I succumbed to the siren call of the mini-chopper.

Several times.

They were shiny.

They were small.

They had such promise.

They were terrible.

I tried (and immediately gave away) about three or four of them. They were weird to use, you practically had to chop the stuff yourself to get it to a size that the gadgets would work with, and they were awkward to clean. They would chop some of the contents to a fine mince, while other pieces were still huge. They couldn’t handle much more than a quarter of an onion, and really, when do you need only a quarter of an onion?

So when Kuhn Rikon sent me their Swiss Chop Chop to try out, I was cautious. It looked cool, with its reasonably large capacity, two spinning blades, and the funky ripcord mechanism. I liked the idea of the little arm at the bottom of the bowl to keep contents moving towards the blades. But I had been disappointed so many times, it made me more than a little bit skeptical.

But I am skeptical no more.

This thing actually works!

I threw in two shallots which I had peeled and halved, and with ten pulls, they looked like this:

It made quick work of minced garlic, and was big enough to do a whole onion a once. It comes with a lid, so you can use it to store things, which is pretty handy. Because of the whole pull-cord mechanism, you can’t put the top in the dishwasher, so that isn’t ideal, but the rest of the pieces do go in, which is good for the clean-up factor. All in all, it was definitely the best version of any of the mini manual choppers that I have used, and I have a feeling it will be in regular rotation at my house.

Just don’t tell Michael Ruhlman.

Yours in good taste,
The Polymath

For your very own, click here Kuhn Rikon Swiss Chop Chop