Snacember 14

Everyone starting to get a little "hurry up with the holidays already"?

Mid December, my energy starts to wane a bit.  In part, because Christmas is not the holiday of my people, and I begin to lose my heart-warmed fascination with the twinkle lights and generousity of spirit, and I start to go all "Really?  With the flipping Christmas music 24 HOURS A DAY, really?".  It matters not that my people wrote and recorded some of the best holiday tunes, there are only so many times one wants to hear Barbra do White Christmas.

I want to be able to go to the grocery store without being accosted by red suited fat men in beards wielding bells and buckets asking for my spare change, and go back to being accosted by plastic bag suited skinny men in stubble wielding windshield solution and rags asking for my spare change.

I try so very hard not to let the Humbug take hold, especially since I do get the anticipation of spending Christmas Eve watching Amazing Goddaughter open her presents with true wonder and loud exclamations of delight, and Christmas Day with some of my other favorite Gentiles, Officer K and his family, with the Christmas ham and all the trimmings.  Yum!  Holiday cheer!

But those wonderful celebrations that bring me back to the place where I love and appreciate this holiday that isn't mine are still a week and a half away, and I've been listening to freaking Sleigh Ride since Halloween!

Which means I need a moment (or five) of Zen.

If you are also having your patience a little frazzled- whether it is anticipating hoardes of relatives descending upon you, or the frustration of not yet being able to find the last Zhou Zhou Dream House or whatever your kid needs to prevent Xmas Morning Meltdown, or if you too are not of a background that includes Xmas as one of its holidays and are really sick of having someone elses stuff foisted upon you everywhere you go- here are my five best tips for regaining balance.

1.  Tea.  Really good tea, made in a small pot, and served with milk and real sugar, in a pretty tea cup.  With some cookies on the side.  I put it all on a little tray, and snuggle up in a cozy chair in my front window, a wrap around my shoulders and a good book in my lap, and for an hour or so, I just read and sip and take little mouse-like nibbles and let everything get back to even.



My teapot of choice.
















Their winter collection, warming and yummy.















The perfect crispy spicy cookie to go with tea!









2.  Bath.  Hot bath.  Long bath. With candles.  And double bubbles.  And by double bubbles, I mean bubbles in the bath and in my glass.   I guarantee you that a long soak in fragrant water with a glass or two of champagne (preferably pink!) will lift your spirits tremendously.  Open that bottle of sparkles that someone brought to your last party.  Or pick up something special for yourself.  Gruet makes a very affordable and delicious sparkling wine, and yes they have pink, and they also come in half-bottles.  Remember you are trying to mellow out, not get schnockered.







I like stemless flutes for bathing, less likely to have a tip-over incident.  These are also great for parties!













For the most delicious smelling candles, I go with Kobo!










3.  Buttered Egg Noodles.  Seriously, I don't know why, but they always make me feel better.  I like the extra wide ones, but use whatever you prefer, or any other pasta you like, what matters is that they are slicked with the barest hint of really good butter and some salt, in a bowl on my lap.  I resist every urge to gussy them up with lemon zest or chopped parsley or cheese, and remind myself that what will make me happiest is just the simplest bowl of childhood comfort food. 




Plugra is my go to butter.  And it does make a difference.












4.  Eloise.  Yes, the kids book.  Eloise is what works for me, but you can grab any of your own childhood faves.  I am instantly transported to when this time of year meant winter vacation and no school and plenty of time to read and presents and everything wonderful. 




Eloise is my go-to girl.  I still want to be her when I grow up.
















The Little House series always made me feel better, especially since I was not living on the prairie trying to keep warm in front of a wood-burning stove.













The Phantom Tollbooth is one of those books that actually can become even more meaningful when you come back to it as a grown up.















The Once and Future King sparked a lifetime love of all things Camelot.











5.  List making.  I know that list making doesn't really seem like fun, or particularly calming, but I don't mean the traditional lists that you have to make all the time for errand-running or grocery shopping.  I mean hopeful lists.  Wish lists.  Pretend you are a kid and it isn't inappropriate to create a totally materialistic list of stuff you long for lists?  Make a list of places you want to travel, or adventures you want to have.  Think bucket list.  Partnered?  Make a list of all the things you want to do or see with your sweetie.  Single?  Make a list of everything you want your future honey to be.  Dream big,  be honest, and take the time to fully indulge in the fantasy.  Yes, winning the lottery is a valid dream, I have all kinds of plans for when I do.  And no, World Peace and Cure for Cancer are not for these lists.  These need to be personal and self-indulgent.

Some things on my "lottery winning list"...




IPad.  Need I really say more?

Cutipol Ebony Flatware.  I want twelve placesettings of this like I want air.  Charming Suitor and I first saw this stuff in Montreal, and both of us immediately fell in love with the line from Portugal.  Both casual and elegant, and beautifully made.  Yum.

Queen Size Serta Perfect Day Waking Hour Mattress with Mega Euro Top.  Matress of the Gods.  The tallest, squishiest, most cloudlike mattress EVER.  I own my Princess and the Pea tendancies, and this bed is insanely amazing.

Thermomix TM31  This machine defies description, but for simplicity, lets just say it is a blender that cooks.  It also makes risotto. And purees of things that have a texture so ethereal it is like a mouthful of velvet.  They won't sell them in the US, but the Canadian ones have the same plugs and I'm desperately trying to finagle one.  Also?  I might have to hock a kidney, since these puppies cost more than all my other small appliances combined.








Some other things?  I want my books to go all bestseller, I want someone to option them for film and television, and to rake in eleventy million dollars.  I want to buy my building and convert it into a single house and hire NY Penny to help me and Charming Suitor make it the coziest most beautiful place on the planet.  I want a little house in France where Charming Suitor and I can hole up for a couple of months a year, meeting quirky locals and eventually being embraced by the community.  I want to never ever get another piece of Spam mail.  I want some doctors to discover the key to long life and health on a total pasta and chocolate cake diet.  I want everyone I love to get everything they want too.

Okay.  I feel better. I think I can get through the next couple of weeks.

What's on your list?

Yours in Good Taste,
The Polymath

Holy Sheet!

It may have been mentioned before that I am an unapologetic bed snob.

This is significantly due to the fact that I am someone who needs an average of ten hours of sleep per night to feel really rested. Don’t judge me. I’m not bad, I’m just drawn that way.

I also had a particular fondness for the fairy tale of the Princess and the Pea as a child, never really absorbing the lesson embedded in the story, and instead focusing on the sheer delicious idea of a bed made up of that many mattresses all piled high and soft as clouds.

When I was in high school, my grandmother gave me the best, most basic advice anyone ever has…she said, and I quote “You’re going to spend 80% of your life working and sleeping. So get a job that you love, and a really good bed.” One cannot, nay should not ignore advice of such simple perfection. And though she will often protest (with good reason) that I never listened overmuch, when Mom gave lessons on where to be frugal and where to invest in quality, I absorbed her wisdom.

I will, to be honest, often fail to practice said wisdom, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t sink in.

The gist of it is this: it is always about the CPU. Cost. Per. Use.

If you spend $300 on a purse that matches exactly one dress in your closet, which will either be out of fashion (or possibly not fit you) beyond two wearings, then the CPU on that bag is $150. If someone suggested you rent a bag for a night for $150 you might think them insane, and yet, that is essentially what you are doing. By the same token, if you spend $1500 on a classic black cashmere overcoat that you will wear approximately once a day from mid-November thru mid- March for the next ten years, the CPU on that coat is only about $1.50. That makes it a good investment.

I have plenty of sassy shoes that tempted me into a less-than-smart purchase, more than a few items of clothing for which I probably should not have paid retail. But when it comes to my bed, I have invested very wisely. After all, a decent bed should last you 15-20 years of daily use. Good sheets can go 8-10 depending on how many sets you have and how many washings they get. Pillows are good for at least 5 years before they lose their fluff. And anyone who has ever spent a night under Grandma’s quilt or Aunt Joan’s feather duvet knows that blankets sometimes last a lifetime. Those are really good CPU figures.

So I have always bought the best sheets and blankets and pillows I could afford, and my bed is a magical place as a result. I’m a major squish-factor girl (see: Princess and Pea reference above), so atop my box spring and mattress (Serta) I have not one, but two featherbeds (The Company Store). Despite what you might think about sleeping on top of feathers, it isn’t a seasonal thing like down comforters. The air mixed in with the feathers actually keeps you cooler in the summer and warmer in the winter. And if you think it wouldn’t be good for your back, think again, those feathers mold and support your body, cradling your every vertebrae, and as you shift, so do they. If you require firmness, you achieve that with the mattress, the featherbeds just add a layer of comfy. And no, two is not the recommended dosage, I’m just a more is more kind of girl in general, and left to my own devices, I would stack ten of them up (see: Princess and Pea reference above) and buy a ladder to get me into bed.

I have a lovely woven cotton blanket for summer, a fluffy fuzzy blanket for spring and fall, and a silk fiber filled comforter (all the warmth for a quarter the thickness of down) for winter. The last one was a gift from Mom and Dad that they brought me from China, and no, I do not call that enabling, I call that love! I used to be a down comforter girl, but silk, oh man!

Pillows are down, and always in abundance.

Sheets, for me, have always had to be 100% cotton (Egyptian preferable) with a decent thread count (350-400 minimum) and a soft silky feel.

Mom and Dad stop reading alert!

Softness in sheets is paramount. For good reason. Your Polymath does not believe in pajamas or night gowns unless she has a houseguest or it is really jaw-droppingly cold, so soft sheets become very essential. And let’s be honest, there isn’t much point to investing in really nice sheets if one is going to go to bed fully dressed. I’m not saying, I’m just saying.

Mom and Dad may now tune back in.

So when I tell you of a new revelation in sheets, you are going to have to believe, I know whereof I speak. And I am here to tell you that there is a sheet revolution going on at my house.

Mom and Sis went recently to a new spa in the area, and were taken by how soft the sheets were on the massage tables. They inquired as to the source, found out that the sheets were available to the general public and came in sizes for regular beds, and ordered some up. The last time I was over at Mom and Dad’s, Mom told me to go feel their new sheets, and I have to say, I was very envious.

And impressed.

Especially when I found out that they were made of….wait for it….100% polyester.

Yep. No cotton in the world has ever felt this soft. I was perplexed. I was shaken to my core. I am a natural fiber girl! But these sheets, yum.

I was waxing poetical about them to Charming Suitor, who is very tolerant of all of my quirks and habits, including my ridiculous poofy bedstravaganza, and bless his heart he jumped right online and ordered us up not only a set of the sheets, but a new duvet for the silk comforter to boot! He really is the dreamiest.

They arrived a week later, rolled into fat sausage shapes and tied with a belt of contrasting fabric, like little presents. We threw them immediately in the wash, and being polyester, they came out of the dryer looking practically ironed.

All I can say about them is that it is by far the softest, most luscious sheet ever.

Charming Suitor just said “Oh, my. I’m in big trouble. We might have to make a more significant investment here.”

Which is actually the best part…they are very reasonably priced! $130 gets you a queen set of fitted sheet, flat sheet and two pillowcases! Not bad at all.

The shipping can be a little dear, but on the day they arrived Charming Suitor got an e-mail announcing a free-shipping special, and when he contacted them to say that the free shipping started the day the sheets arrived, they refunded his shipping cost!

They do not know me, I am not being compensated for this endorsement, and I do not own stock in the company. I just want you all to sleep well.

http://www.ruvalonline.com/

Meanwhile, if you are in the market for a new mattress set, I have been coveting the Serta Perfect Day Sleeper in the Waking Hours Model. I go to American Mattress periodically to visit it. It is very squishy and very craveworthy, and way out of my price range. But a Princess can dream….