Oh Tivo, My Tivo

I'm a Tivo girl. My folks got me my Tivo many years ago for my birthday, and it changed my life.

So I'm really conflicted about the fact that I am waiting at home for Comcast to come and upgrade my internet, change over my phone, and install my new DVR cable box. Which is making me a little panicky, since I'm an idiot and scheduled them to come the day after I get home from a week in NY, and so I am frantically trying to watch a whole week of recorded shows that I missed before they come pull the plug.

I have to say goodbye to my beloved Tivo, and it makes me sad. I like the little dancing TV logo guy. I like the soothing colors of the screens, and the ease of finding programs and the little bah-looping sound it makes when you fast forward through commercials.

Bah-loop, bah-loop, bah-loop. In slightly increasing pitch. Like a little song. Bah-loop, bah-loop, bah-loop. No-more, bore-dom, for-you! Do-not, watch-the, dumb-ads! Find-out, what-hap, pens-next!

It has become code in my family, when dad, who (like all dad's) hates to give up the remote, but is also not as quick on the fast forward as his daughters might like, falls asleep at the wheel and lets the commercials run.

"Um, bah-loop, bah-loop, bah-loop there dad."

or "You aren't bah-looping very well."

or "Do you need me to bah-loop this for you?"

The DVRs don't bah-loop.

But then again, at the moment it takes all freaking day to download something onto my computer, and the best bundle included the cable upgrade as well as the internet, and as much as I love my bah-looping buddy, it is an old model that can only record one station at a time, and this makes for some serious Sophie's Choices in the television department.

Law and Order SVU vs. Criminal Minds? Law and Order Criminal Intent vs. Lie to Me? Good lord, it's like asking me to choose between chocolate and caramel, between mashed potatoes and risotto.

The DVR can record two stations at once.

So, of course, can the fancy new Tivo HD XL, which can not only do two stations at once, but can record up to 1500 hours of programming. Mmmmm. Fancy new Tivo. How I covet thee.

But sadly, it is a $500 machine, not including the lifetime service package, and that just doesn't take precidence over, say, rent. Can't watch TV unless you live indoors.

So as of today, I'll lose my Tivo and all that lovely bah-looping, and the colorful screens, and the little dancing logo and clockwork gears and join the world of the DVR.

But someday, Tivo, I'll be back. Cause I have the feeling that I just can't quit you.